4 weeks PREGNANT! With Beta results!

OMG I AM actually pregnant! 

I was hoping my beta would be at least 100 but knew it could still be okay if it was lower... It was 181!!! WOOOOO!!!!  I am thrilled with that number! I go back Monday since the clinic is closed on Sunday for the next one!
I want to type more but I am so exhausted!

8dp5dt (13dpo)

Love me some dr. horrible

I almost forgot to write today... Not much going on other than nail biting. I am symptom checking every 10 minutes so make sure I still feel pregnant (I do most checks lol). I didn't test today and I am not sure that was any better LOL! I think not testing made me just as nuts. Oh well.
There is a part of me soooo nervous and afraid. I keep thinking back on my past and all the losses. I stress that levels will be low or will drop... Then there is the other part of me- I feel like it will be OK. I didn't feel that way with any of my m/c deep down inside. With each one i felt it was off or wrong even if I didn't want to admit it to myself. I don't feel that way this time.
So betas are tomorrow! EEK!!!!

symptoms:
slightly sore full breasts
mild cramping and fullness
vivid dreams
hormonal
forgetful

7dp5dt (12dpo)

I am officially done testing now! It just stresses me out and my beta is on Friday so I think it's time. I had been saving the digitals for a long while til I was sure they would show :) Very excited to see those!!

Symptoms are growing too :)
I have been having vivid nightmare the last two nights... OMG seriously I am crazy. Between rabid animals and serial killers I have woken up almost screaming a few times now. I get night terrors when I m pregnant and I think this is the start. Should be very entertaining for DH when he wakes to me screaming over nothing LOL!
Also I am hormonal today.... And that's also a symptom for me with DS#1. I got angry at the shower-head today and my toothbrush LOL!

Symptoms:
cramps
bit bloated
slightly sore swollen breast
hormonal
nightmares/vivid dreams

6dp5dt 11dpo

 I am a spoiled brat always hoping for more :p I want my tests darker already! I am comparing them to others wishing they were as dark as theirs. Then I slap myself and remember I have never gotten a BFP at 10dpo that I could see! So I need to STFU and trust the process. 

Also I want more symptoms... Although today my wish came true a bit and I have some good cramps (IMPLANT BABIES!!) and my breast are slightly swollen and sore. I just want stronger symptoms! See there she is again... spoiled brat :p

Symptoms:

cramps on an off

mild swollen slightly sore breasts

5dp5dt 10dpo BFP?!?!??!

Yesterday was officallly freak out day... Not anything to do with tests but more lack of symptoms. Today would have been the same but the tests Gods are in my favor apparently!
Did the FMU and didn't think I saw anything. Took a SMU and within 5 min saw a super light line (the second pic). I decided since I have cheapies for once, I may as well curb the urge and use those tonight... And Uh I think we have something brewing!!

Problem is my symptoms are nothing much at all. Every pgy i have had, my breast were sore even before I even saw a line. Tonight they are full feeling and a bit itchy but not much. I have had some cramping but minimal. Freaks me out! I wanna feel like crap :p
I just keep reminding myself that every pregnancy is different! But it looks like this IS a pregnancy!
O
M
G!

4dp5dt (9dpo)

Bummer but the anxiety started today and panic set in :/ I am trying my best to ignore it and try to remain calm and positive. I think I was hoping I would have sore boobs today but that didn't really happen so I started to panic. Blah i hate anxiety!
I stocked up on HPTs today since my stash was pretty thin... Here's hoping I never have to buy another HPT EVER!!!

Symptoms:
cramping last night & bloating
nothing really today :/

3dp5dt (8dpo)

I wish I had something more entertaining but I simply don't. Not much happening and my mood has been great.
I am however glad I don't have to wait TWO weeks and that with IVF you cheat a little ;)

Symptoms:
Slight sore breasts
tired
mild cramps